Saturday Football

Plymouth v. Blackpool 10/11 bet365

Aston Villa v. Fulham 4/6 Various

Millwall v. Aldershot 4/7 Various

Watford v. Doncaster 5/6 Stan James

Falkirk v. Hibernian DRAW 12/5 Various


Smashing into Plymouth. They'll no doubt lose knowing my form.

Like the massive Arsenal/Blackburn double tomorrow too.

GL everyone.

Some "Irish Jokes" No Offence To Anyone Intended !

Paddy & Mick go to London to donate sperm. It was a disaster! Paddy missed the tube & Mick came on the bus!!

Paddy calls Easyjet to book a flight. The operator asks 'How many people are flying with you?' Paddy replies 'I dont know! Its your f***ing plane!!'

Two Irish couples decided to swap partners for the night. After 3 hours of amazing sex Paddy says 'I wonder how the girls are getting on'

Paddy takes his new wife to bed on their wedding night. She undresses & lies on the bed spread-eagled & says 'You know what I want don't you?'' 'Yeah,' says Paddy. 'The whole friggin bed by the looks of it!'

Q. What's a Catholic priest & a pint of Guiness got in common? A. black coat, white collar & you've got to watch your arse if you get a dodgy one!

Paddy the electrician got sacked from the U.S. prison service for not servicing the electric chair. He said in his professional opinion it was a death trap!

Paddy, the Irish boyfriend of the woman whos head was found on Arbroath beach was asked to identify her. A detective held up the head to which point Paddy said 'I dont think thats her, she was taller than that!'

Paddy is said to be shocked at finding out all his cows have Bluetongue.'Be Jeysus!' he said, 'I didnt even know they had mobile phones!'

Mick & Paddy are reading head stones at a nearby cemetery. Mick says 'Crikey! Theres a bloke here who was 152!' Paddy says 'Whats his name?' Mick replies 'Miles from London!'

Blades vs Wolves - preview

I am feeling good about a United win Tuesday night. Wolves may be top of the table by six points, a comfortable twelve points ahead of Sheffield United, but I feel good about predicting that come Wednesday, that lead over us will be reduced to nine. Let me explain.

Wolves aren’t that good.

Okay, that analysis was Scott-like, but it’s true. They aren’t that good. Look at their fixtures so far this season and you’ll see they’ve had a dream run, much like Reading in their last promotion season. They’ve played teams at the right time and have built confidence off the back off winning. They kick off scraping a draw at Deepdale, before scoring nine against a newly promoted Forest and an awful Wednesday side. A run of decent wins off the back off those confidence builders follows before they lose (at home) to the only good side they’ve played so far this term (Reading 0-3). They have also lost away to Swansea, who are no great shakes and they were pumped 5-2 at Carrow Road; Norwich sit proudly in 19th, four points above the drop zone. They haven’t played Brum yet, they haven’t played us yet, they were tonked by Reading, they were lucky to beat Ipswich by all accounts and the only other top six side they’ve played was Burnley, where they did get a decent 2-0 win - but anyone can beat anyone in this league, Barnsley beat Burnley tonight, so what does that say?

Wolves are overrated.

Sheffield United on the other hand are not. We were unlucky not to get a point against Brum, who will go up. We did also lose the other week to Reading, but we were out of sorts on the day, for several reasons which I won’t go into here. In the second half, we had chances to win the match, let alone get a point, but anyway, we put things right on Saturday by scoring five goals - I can’t remember the last time I saw United score five goals, but I have been saying for quite some time that with all the attacking stuff we’re playing, we were due to spank someone eventually.

Despite our defeat to Reading, we have still only conceded 13 goals in 18 matches and our home record is better still, conceding just four in nine (two of those against Reading, who will win the league in my opinion) . Wolves on the other hand are ropey as anything, shipping 25 in 18 games, 17 conceded in nine matches away from home.

Where they do excel, is goal scoring. They’ve notched 41 times in 18 games, which is impressive indeed. But hell, even we can score five times against bottom three sides, as Charlton discovered at the weekend. And our scoring record is exactly comparable to Birmingham, who are currently second, so we’re not desperately short of firepower ourselves.

Throw into the mix the fact that we have the hold over them in recent years at Bramall Lane and things look even rosier. In the last ten seasons, we’ve met fifteen times; United have won five, Wolves four times and six have ended all square – fairly even. But at the Lane, our ten season record reads P7 W4 D3 L0. It’s worth noting too, that one of the Wolves wins and one of those draws were end of season games with nothing to play for and players rested. Furthermore, one of the Wolves wins was in the Play-Off final of 2003, where Sheffield United cracked under the big match pressure at the Millennium Stadium. God, we even beat them 3-1 under Bryan Robson for fuck’s sake and we all know what a shitter of a season (and team) that was.

The best news of all, is that Iwelumo is fit and should start for Wolves ;-)

United are best price 13/8, which looks a good enough bet to me. I also predict goals – they score a lot, we score our fair share and we won’t concede many, but we’ve wobbled a bit with Ugo suspended (shipped four in our last two) and as I said in my Reading preview, Bramall Lane is ready to see some goals to get our average up. The last five meetings with Wolves at the Lane have ended 3-1, 1-0, 3-3, 3-3 and 2-2 – which bodes well for that theory. I reckon 3-1 could be the way to go with the correct score. Oddschecker has packed up, but William Hill go 20/1 for 3-1 and Betdaq offers me 23.0 at present – surely worth a cheeky couple of quid? Not sure if over 2.5 goals at 1.9 is any value, really. I’ll let you make your own minds up on that. I’d say it’s pretty likely, to be honest.

COME ON YOU RED AND WHITE WIZAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAAARDS!

Previous post continued

More Bollage - apologies for some

BOL

Fancy tricks...

Scott showed me this:
it is awesome.

Quick Update From Me

I've had a pretty hectic week of it; which is something which I aren't really that used to these days ! Tomorrow morning I'm heading up to Glasgow for the weekend to enjoy my old mate Mo Golden's wedding. Then onto Dundee on Monday to enjoy some drunken banter, and then on Tuesday meeting up (hopefully) with fellow Scoop Troop members Scott and Ken for my first visit to DUPS since DUSoP earlier this year. I don't know what the event is yet, but I'm hoping the night will be remembered more for banter and socialising than the actual poker !

In other news, Christo aka Killer Chris aka McElgravy asked casually whether I fancied running in the Daily 30k on 'Stars tonight; but I'm starting to think it probably isn't a good idea given I've got a 6.00am start in the morning. Two years ago that would have been water off a ducks back, with late night poker / drinking / reading of "Asian Babes" was a staple diet of the Scoop Troop, and while other members would retire to bed, I would be opening up the Post Office in the seedy Charleston district of Dundee. How things have changed, lol.

Oh, and I had a token tenner on Germany -1 last night; along with an Argentina and Germany double. The less said the better on that; and also emphasising once more that betting on friendly internationals is rarely fruitful (for me at least).

I'll leave you with a random photo. Enjoy.

Wasn't 80's "fashion" tawdry ?

Thanks for reading
Mountain Man

IPO "Festival"

http://www.boylesports.com/sections/poker/d.asp?show=IPO2008_Online_Festival


For those who played in the event and dealt, Boyle poker are holding some tournies blah blah.

Anyway. I'm thinking cause I'm skint I may play the lower buy-in tourney on Friday.

I'm working on Sunday so can't make that ane. They are adding $5k to the prize pools with an initial buyin of $15+$1.50. I haven't paid the slightest bit of attention to all this stuff and plus im busy at uni these days, so if anyone else is in the same boat as me hopefully it'll mean that nobody else has noticed this "festival" either, and this could mean lower player turnouts.

If it looks like it'll be a nice bit of money for whoever cashes, and I can be arsed, I may play this.

LAERTES!

A Scoop Troop favourite runs tomorrow at Wetherby (2.55) in the shape of Laertes. We had a great time at Perth earlier this year cheering this one in at 10/1. EP suggests it should be around 10/1 and has a very legit shout. Get a bit on Troopers.

Few other horses for tomorrow:

Paddy Power Gold Cup (Cheltenham 2.35) - Barbers Shop c.7/1

Cheltenham 2.00 - Beat The Boys c.8/1

glglglgl

Scott

I'm A Celeb + Saturday Football Betting

I'm A Celebrity, Get Me Out Of Here starts on Sunday and gives us some interesting betting opportunities.

In the 7 series so far winners have included Tony Blackburn, Joe Pasquale, Carol Thatcher and Christopher Biggins showing a trend of slightly older winners. There has also been second places for Jennie Bond and Paul Burrell.

This year there are a few who fit into the above category - Martina Navratilova, George Takei, Esther Rantzen and Robert Kilroy-Silk. However, I reckon we can rule out a couple of these. Kilroy is a former chat show host and I believe he is now running about as a politician - I'm ruling him out cos he is a douche fag. I'm ruling Esther out for similar reasons as she will definately be very annoying. That leaves us with Martina, perhaps the greatest female tennis player of all time, and George - some guy from Star Trek who I've never heard of!

My selection is George Takei. I'm led to believe that Ant & Dec suggested George to the show's producers after he starred on one of their shows in America. They are also quoted as saying he is their favourite and they definately have some sway over the audience.

The current favourite is ex-Eastender Joe Swash who played Mickey and he is a fair favourite as I imagine he'll be decently entertaining but is far too short atm. George Takei is best price 13/2 at Boylesports but I reckon you can easily get a better price on the exchanges if you ask.

Have a saver on Navratilova at 7s.a

Few early selections for Saturday's football:

Swindon v. Leicester 6/5 Ladbrokes

Cardiff v. Crystal Palace 11/10 Ladbrokes

Q.P.R v. Burnley DRAW 12/5 Ladbrokes

East Stirling v. Dumbarton 6/5 Coral

GL with any bets.

Scott

Sheffield United vs Reading

Off to Beautiful Downtown Bramall Lane as ever on Saturday, so he’s a little preview for you punters.

This looks a toughie to call on paper and the bookies have some wildly differing views on the matter, the high street offering prices ranging from 5/4 to 6/4 about United, 8/5 to 15/8 on Reading and 11/5 to 12/5 on the draw. I have to mention that my new employers William Hill are offering some of the worst odds on this match, they obviously know something …

Both sides are in good form, but ours is far better, results-wise. United’s 2-1 win over Barnsley (didn’t someone here predict that?) means they are now unbeaten in five, having lost just once in the last nine league matches, that match finishing 1-0 with the Blades having ten men for over two-thirds of the game. Reading have lost once in their last five matches but have scored seven goals in the last two matches. They are also second top scorers in the league, only one side has scored more away from home and Kevin Doyle leads the scoring charts with 13 goals (Beattie is United’s top scorer with seven, by way of comparison). Interestingly though, United are the league’s tightest defence, conceding just nine times in 16 matches, just twice in eight home fixtures – now you can see why the bookies and indeed the punters are struggling to call it.

Looking in more detail at Reading’s form cheered me up a bit. I came into this thinking I’d be predicting a Blades defeat (Reading are a serious bogey team, we never get anything off them – two draws and eight defeats in the last ten league matches and in the promotion season, we should have won both games but for ridiculous referees and luck, opinions backed up by most Reading fans I spoke to about it) but it seems Reading’s away form is incredibly patchy. Two wins, four draws, four defeats, 12 goals scored and 12 conceded – far from promotion form. Interestingly, they beat top of the league Wolves 3-0 away and spanked Bristol City 4-1, but then they drew with a poor Watford outfit (needing a fictional goal to get that point) as well as losing 4-2 to a terrible Charlton side, drawing 0-0 with newly promoted Forest and slipping up with poor results against Burnley and Ipswich.

My one concern about United’s defence, though rock solid of late, is that we could be shaken by the recent Chris Morgan affair. Coppell is a slimy toss-piece and they always target our players (remember Gillespie being sent off after a minute?) for dirty tricks. I fully expect everyone to be winding Morgs up, as well as diving about like the cheating filth that they are, which might knock him out of his stride. With Ugo suspended and no centre half cover, we could end up in trouble. Morgan is going to be the key for me; if he rises to it and plays well, we’ll win by the odd goal, but if he gets riled, gets an early booking and God forbid, gets sent off, we’re in trouble against a free-scoring Reading. With their recent “bogey side” history against us, I’d fully expect the latter.

Bramall Lane has not been the place to see goals this season, with just 14 in eight (1.75 a game). By contrast, Wolverhampton tops the table with 3.375 a game. I take this to mean that our average is due to climb a little, rather than suggesting another low scoring game and as Reading are second top scorers in the league, this is the game to target. But as I’ve said, if Morgan keeps his head and we don’t succumb to their tricks, keeping 11 men on the pitch, we do have the defence to keep them quiet. We’re also “due” a win against our old bogey side (gambler’s fallacy!) and at 6/4 (Coral, Betfred, Bet365, many more) I honestly believe we look good value.

If you’re just looking for a couple of quid at bigger odds, I am predicting another 2-1 home win. I’m feeling good about a win by the odd goal, I don’t think it’ll be 1-0 as we’re due some goals and we continue to create plenty of chances. It won’t be as high as 3-2 as our defence is simply too canny. William Hill again go best price at 10/1 and interestingly, the Magic Sign go as short as 7/1.

*** HEDGING ALERT ***

I will be reverting to superstitious type for this one and I can assure you I won’t be placing any bets. That’s only because it’s important for our promotion bid and I don’t want to jinx us, I reckon my punting logic is sound! Also bear in mind that I never talk United up and have done this consistently in the last fortnight or so, which means my dreams are soon to be shattered. I’m such a superstitious fool.

***STALKING ALERT****

After the match, The Bon Bon Club are playing a pub round the corner from the Lane. If I don't get at least a photo of me with Reenie (ex Long Blondes bassist), I'm going to cry. It's a small place, free entry and a few other bands on, should be a laugh.

<3

My goings On

It's been a while since my last post as I have been pretty hectic over the last few weeks but I'll let you know what I've been up to.

Unfortunately I couldn't make it to Dublin with the rest of the Scoop Troop but I did recently take a trip to Bremen for 4 nights. Why Bremen you may ask? Well I had booked a week off in late October and had hoped to get away somewhere sunny for the week. When I looked at Gran canaria and the likes though, the cost seemed so ridiculous for the time of year I ditched that idea. Then I saw Ryanair had some cheap flights and Bremen was one of the destinations so I thought why not!

We arrived in Bremen on Monday and headed straight to the Freimarkt - Bremens own Oktoberfest but with the focus more on the carnival rides and stalls rather than the beer. We soaked up a few beers and explored the fair. There was plnety to do there and the highlight of the Wednesday night was Mickie Krause < see video http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=PaHB0zYoeQI&feature=related > It may sound crap but its one of those things that you had to be there!

We also took a game between Werder Bremen and Bayer Leverkusen. It was a decent game with the hosts going down 2-0 despite some early chances. The stadium was impressive for one so old and the fans were extremely passionate, particularly those behind the goals who even when 2-0 kept waving their flags and singing. It was nice to have a beer during the game too. We were made to feel welcome and really got behind Werder.

The other highlight of the trip was a trip to the Becks Brewery where they produce Becks (obviously) and also various varieties of Haake Beck- a local beer only sold in the Bremen area. We got shown around and told of the processes. An amazing 7 million bottles of Becks are produced each day and many of them were on show outside with many other millions brewing in the tanks below. The tour was capped off with 4 glasses of Becks afterwards. I would reccomend the Haake Beck if anyone gets the chance to try it. I won't bore you with everything I did on the trip but all in all it was a really nice place to visit and there are far worse places you could choose if your looking for a couple of quiet days away.

Another rest of my time has been spent attending Dundee United matches. Anyone who remembers me a few years ago will know I was always a United supporter but made 1 game a season if lucky. The last couple of years though I have become hooked on the game. This season I have only missed 4 United games in total and the last few weeks especially have been great. The highlight was without doubt my 1st trip to Ibrox where we bravely earned a 3-3 draw only succumbing to a last minute equaliser. Despite only having a few hundred fans there we all sung our hearts out and saw one of the best games your likely to see in the SPL all season.

All this has meant it has been a bit quiet on the horse racing front for me but I'm sure that will all change soon. Oh I owe Scott a beer from a couple weeks back-I'm back in Dundee this Saturday if you fancy hitting the Union?

Things Could Have Been Worse

So, as I had planned yesterday; I attended the Pub Poker event, and although it was hardly organised or played in any such way that the World Series should be worried, it was certainly a cut above many home games I have attended. After arriving early, just before six, the signs did not look good. The pub was full of a mixture of elderly people who appeared to be stragglers from the Sunday lunch trade; and a couple of tables of student types who were making an early start on what has become a traditional student night in York city centre now. (Talk about starting the week as you mean to go on !)

After settling down on a bar stool with a very pleasant pint of “Roosters Yankee” (insert your own Dave Wilkie joke here, saves me a job) I got chatting to the amiable young chap behind the bar. It emerged that although the poker is advertised as starting at 7pm, it is actually nearer 8 by the time it gets going. After being used to more strict schedules of the casino and DUPS, I was already preparing myself for a shambolic farce, so to get chilled out and more into the mood for a more casual game, I knocked back a few more pints and perused a couple of well thumbed Sunday red tops while I waited for something to happen.

I kept my head down while one or two scruffy individuals made their way in, quite possibly for the poker. I raised a wry smile to myself as one of them requested a glass of water (insert another joke about D.W. here) which confirmed to me that they were here to take part in the evening’s festivities. Shortly after 7pm, a slightly flustered fellow clutching a cycle helmet, a rucksack and a cash tin, burst in; whom it appeared was the chair, cum secretary, cum treasurer of the poker club. Although I felt slightly inclined to help him when I heard the all too familiar sound of scraping chairs and tables being rearranged, I instead followed the examples of Iain Boxer et al, and skulked with my head down at the bar and ordered another drink !

Eventually, time came to get registered, and after the buzz of about nine or ten regulars, I went forward and paid my fiver, plus a token £2 administration fee which is apparently a one off payment, although there was no receipt of this, nor an expiry date; but I guess I can cope with £2 ! As it originally appeared, this was a one man show, and the guy, whose name incidentally was “Trev” (short for Trevor, most likely, how unfortunate !) was assuming the role of Tournament Director, as well as doing everything else. I did offer to help out (mumbling something about DUPS, which he really wasn’t at all interested in; but wasn’t in the slightest bit rude) but Trev assured me he could manage.

The table draw was made, and the twenty one players were all seated by 8.15pm around 3 tables. Surprisingly, the pub had a laptop, and the programme “Tournament Director”, which I hadn’t expected. I don’t know why I hadn’t expected it; but it was reassuring to see. Other plus points from the point of view of equipment was that the tables were all covered with a decent felt / baize, the chips were of good quality and there were adequate dealer buttons. Unfortunately though, there were no rulings regarding the placing of drinks on the tables (and given we were using ordinary pub tables, simply covered with baize there were no cup holders). Although I didn’t see any drinks being spilt, they could quite easily have been; and several times the cards were trailed through damp patches where drinks had stood. Which leads me onto the cards themselves; which were thoroughly hopeless. There were a couple of decks of cheap plastic cards which were probably the ones which had been supplied with the chipsets, many of which were marked and creased. The third deck was a set of Waddington’s playing cards, which probably cost something like 79p and were completely ruined after the first five hands. Although Trev had plenty of decks of these cards, they made for a detrimental aspect on the game. I won’t go on about the merits of KEM or Copag cards here; but for anyone organising a live game of poker, no matter how large or small the tournament is; good playing cards for all of the tables are a must !

So onto the tournament itself then. How did I do ? Well; let’s say I scooped for the first time in a while; but I was the first loser ! Yes I finished second, netting me £30. The prize structure was strange, I couldn’t see that any particular weighting was given; the top 5 paying out £50; £30; £10; £7.50; £7.50. With a blind structure to rival the worst ever seen at Abertay was also enjoyed with 50/100 to start, then doubling each time, from a starting stack of 5k. Inevitably, there was also a mix of players ranging from poor to very poor. I saw one guy call a massive pre flop bet in the second level with King-7 diamonds against pocket Queens. The continuation bet on the raggy flop from our man with the ladies wouldn’t drive the fish out; and of course the inevitable happened and he hit his backdoor flush. Suffice to say, they both ended up all in and that was that. Two incredibly torrid plays from what I could see. Of course there was the inevitable “I only called before the flop because they were suited and I thought I might get a flush !” What a simpleton. There was also a lack of proper etiquette; with the old Texan tavern quotes of “I’ll see your 500 and I’ll raise you another 1600” etc etc. I had already anticipated this and kept quiet about it; knowing although this was wrong, there is little point in educating people who don’t want to learn how to play the game properly, but just recreate scenes from Rounders ! However, I was less easy going with n00bs who were under raising, which happened a number of times. I quite enjoy teaching and helping people when it comes to poker, but only if they too show a willing to learn, and after the sixth time it happened I felt ready to implode, so I went outside for a breath of fresh air …

I played my hands hard and fast; selected them carefully and made a few disciplined folds, perhaps at times erring on the verge of caution. The four times I ended up in a race on the final table, I won three times with JJ holding up against AKo; (sorry mate I’ve got) 99 holding up against K10; and AKo flopping a king against 66. My pocket 5’s were not strong enough to take out the short stacks Q7 suited (oh dear, Dom) but he was a casualty in the next hand to get us down to the cash placings.

It all went pretty quick from then on; four became three a couple of hands in after a former neighbour of mine, Colin Garnham wound up crippling himself when he couldn’t lay down his 9 high straight against two flushes, despite there being four hearts on the board. His big blind saw him all in for the following hand, and although he didn’t look in bad shape with a suited queen; my 8-9clubs from the small blind was good on a board of 2c, 5s, Js, 8d, Ac. The third placed man fell about six hands later in an all in with my heads up opponent with his KJo proving to be the big underdog it was to AJo.

Although I have improved my heads up play, it’s still the weakest part of my game I feel. My opponent was ultra aggressive, and whilst we came into heads up reasonably equal in terms of chips, I found myself folding the first three hands. After he raised into me yet again, a combination of beer and the necessity to make a stand saw me push the rest of my stack in with Q9 offsuit. His instant call made me feel I was beaten fair and square, but was happy to see I had live cards, and to be called by “Sergeant Lobster” (K3) made me wonder if I had played a little more aggressively in the first hand or two of the heads up it may have been a different story. Of course, his K3 held up (the 3 appeared on the river) and the guy celebrated like he had just won the World Series Main Event. Personally, I was happy to have broken my duck of not cashing in a live event for longer than I would care to remember.

So to sum up. Pub Poker. I felt that the night had a lot of potential, but potential which, I’m afraid to say will not be fulfilled due to a lack of ambition from the organiser. A few tweaks here and there, such as a few decks of quality playing cards and a good set of concise house rules would speak volumes. But it is not just up to Trev, who it was clear to see was doing his best to run an event for little more than a couple of complementary beers. If more of the punters took the time to read up on the game, then it would benefit not only themselves, but their fellow players and the game itself. Will I be back ? I don’t see why not. A fiver is nothing for an evenings game, and being fairly soft, could be an earner for a few beers. Mind you, once I had deducted my entrance fees, a dozen drinks, a bag of chips and a taxi, I had still spent about £15 more than I had won !

I Promised Never To Do This...

But tonight I'm going to ! One of the local pubs on my side of town hosts a weekly £5 NLH MTT freezeout. And after deliberating for a few months, I have finally decided that a fiver isn't really a lot to throw away if it is as appalling as I imagine it will be. The fun kicks off at seven, and even if I go out first hand I can still have a laugh as it serves some of the best pints in the city, and according to the landlord, side games generally start up if there are enough players kicking about. Nothing ventured ... nothing gained. Besides, I need some practise before my one-off return to DUPS on November 25th. A few beers that night, methinks... Scott ? Kenny ? Even Will if you could make it ?

I will report back on my findings in due course. I am omitting to name the venue as I aren't entirely clued up on the ins and outs of what is still a grey area to me in terms of the legality of hosting poker outwith a licensed casino or cards room.

Still Awake

sigh, obv gonna see the 1st round then fall asleep, always happens!!!

Here's a classic joke from Chris/Christo!/CHRISNI.....

What's the difference between a gay and a microwave?

A microwave won't brown your sausage.


Have added Blackpool Boy's blog to the links - have a look, it's an interesting poker and sports betting blog.


Immense tune from Late of the Pier - http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cz5Dei5O3xY


Scott

Comedy

Desperately trying to stay awake for the Calzaghe fight - might go grab a couple of hours shut eye now. Anyways....

Fitba

Here’s a quick preview of Barnsley vs Sheffield United for the weekend.

Those of you who have listened to me talk about South Yorkshire derbies in the past will know that I always say it’ll be a draw. I would never back a draw, but the smart money in all South Yorkshire matches really ought to be on the draw. Barnsley are no exception, with half of the last ten meetings ending all square and four of the remaining five matches decided by a single goal. No matter what the form of the sides, the Blades vs Barnsley games are always scrappy affairs, though I have no idea why.

Barnsley will be buzzing after their 3-1 victory away to Charlton on the 1st, but Sheffield United are in excellent form. We’ve conceded just once in the last seven games, in fact just twice in the last eight games and have the tightest defence in the league. Barnsley have scored less than a goal a game, though their home record is marginally better, with nine goals from seven matches. United’s away scoring record is nothing to write home about, but consider that we’ve played Birmingham and Bristol City away from home already, along with the Sheffield derby where we had ten men for over two thirds of the game.

One defeat in the last eight is promotion form, but Barnsley have form of their own, losing just once in six matches. The bare form is largely deceptive though: two of those wins have come against Doncaster Rovers, who have really struggled to score goals so far this term, despite an attractive brand of football and Barnsley’s narrow 2-1 win over Sheffield Wednesday came just two days after the Sheffield derby, which saw Wednesday without FIVE key players due to fatigue and injuries and the reds looked far from convincing (the pigs were down to ten after 34 minutes and the deciding goal was a penalty kick). A 0-0 draw at to Bristol City was a good result but a 3-0 drubbing against a Palace side pulling up few trees is more like the real Barnsley.

United will win this, I’m pretty sure of that. Despite the history of draws and Barnsley’s confidence, they haven’t played a side as good as us since August 23rd when Birmingham won 2-0 at St Andrews and although it’s certain to be scrappy and heated, we’re simply far too classy for them.

There have been 16 goals in Barnsley’s last six matches and although only seven in United’s last six, we have been creating hundreds of chances. Their defensive record at home looks good, conceding five in seven, but they’ve conceded 12 in eight away from home and have played some poor sides at Oakwell this season. On paper, we should run riot, but the derby nature of the game will ensure it isn’t a comfortable win for us and I’m feeling really good about a 1-2 scoreline; my new employers William Hill are going 10/1, which is the best price. Sadly, I’m not legally allowed to bet with them, so it looks like I’ll be getting on at 9s!
Happy punting.

IPO and other stuffs

Dublin was braw. Was brutally expensive and I cried every time I handed over min five euros for a pint - about four fuckin quid. I'm used to £1.80 in the Student's Union!

Anyways, small trip report:
Left Dundee on the Thursday and made our way to the Airport thanks the Megabus where I became the champ at 'Chase the Ace' - a card game I'm sure Dom invented. We get to the airport and meet up with Neil Hairy who as always is good banter and the prop bets started with JJ Mac swallowing a one pence coin when he couldn't get 5 high or low right in a row. Kenny was also unsuccessful and I unloaded some vinegar and salt things into his mouth.
I go the worst of this though when Neil bet me he could name the capital of any country I named - went for Uzbekistan and he slowrolled me before naming 'Tashkent' correctly.

Flight takes 3 seconds and we're in Dublin, we get lost for a while and then find the tawdry Hostel - it was worse than I remember but still decent enough for the price and time we'd actually be there. We met with Cammy and Killer Chris before hitting a few pubs. Me, Ken, EPT Andy and Dom got separated from the rest and stumbled across a nice looking place called 'Mother Kelly's' (or something similar. We go in, I order some beers and then notice the guy next to me is wearing some leather trousers and the guy next to him a leather waistcoat! Then notice that there aint no girls in the whole place and to make it worse some guy gets up to the karaoke thing and starts blasting out some George Michael or similar gay tune. We parked our arses on the chairs, drank very fast then exited sharply. Thank god cos the old fat guy at the bar was giving Kenny the eye!

The rest of Thursday involved more beers followed by double quarter pounder from MacDs - they became my staple diet of the trip. Friday was the IPO Day 1A and all 9 or 10 of us were playing. No real stories as most busted super early and I hit a few gutshots to tilt a few Dutch monkeys. Standard was terrible and I built up to about 45K easily but bust when the only other stack bigger than mine found KK in the BB when I tried to isolate with JJ from the button against a serial 10bb pusher at 800/1500 level. EPT Andy bust shortly after me and we couldn't meet up with the other guys cos they'd went to some other part of hotel which was now a no go so bed time for me.

Briefly met blondes Horneris, ChipRich and LeKnave and they were good banter - would have been good to have had a few beers, another time. Horneris and LeKnave got pretty deep before busting 50-60th. UL guys. On a side note I went to Google Images and typed in 'Dublin IPO' to try and get a pic for this blog entry and all I get is pics of Rich and Brent!!!

Saturday was Kenny's birthday - Kenny wore the thong which can be seen a few posts down. We got drunk, put football bets on, drunk, lost football bets, drunk, watched UFC, drunk more, got poor, went to bank, went to McDonalds, went home.

Felt terrible Sunday so zombied about a bit and lost some football bets. Left on the Monday.

Report over. Go check out this newish band on youtube called Late of the Pier - they gonna rule. Possibly my fav tune at the mo: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=MYuwGGqd0y4

Scott

Andrew Murray

I'm going to start a craze - shit Andy Murray jokes.

What does Andy Murray order when he goes to a bar - deuce.

Andy Murray got charged with breach of the peace. The neighbours said he was making a racket.

Andy Murray's bebo page has 15-Luv on it.

Andy Murray was playing poker and kept getting Aces.

Andy Murray used to be a waiter. His favourite part was the serving.

Andy Murray was asked out by an older woman. He replied, "I don't do 40-Luv"

I'm waiting for my bus to the match...

...so I'm bored and writing this little blog.

I won’t be betting on this match, because I don’t bet on Sheffield United. Every time I do, the footballing gods conspire to ensure United pick up as few points as possible, coupled with me losing my bet. It is however worth pointing out some facts to you chaps, who may wish to have a punt.

Everything points to this game being very close indeed. Last season’s fixtures were both 1-0, United winning away and the Pilgrims winning at the Lane. Plymouth have scored one goal in each of their last four games, form which has seen them win two and lose two. They have scored eight goals away from home, in seven matches, at just over a goal a game.

United’s home form is excellent; we’ve won four and drawn three, unbeaten in seven, conceding just two goals. We are struggling to score though, we’ve only scored ten goals in those home games, 16 in 14 home and away and have scored just once in our last three matches. In addition, Plymouth are quite a physical side and although we have no problem beating passing, footballing sides (Bristol City 3-0, QPR 3-0, Doncaster Rovers 0-2) we struggle against the bigger sides. Add to that the fact that Plymouth are just a point behind us in the league and you should be able to see where I’m coming from about how tight this game looks to be on paper.

Now, I believe we’ve got enough to beat them. We may have scored once in three matches, a scrambled goal by a centre half, but our last two homes matches saw us create more chances than any other game in the season and away to Bristol City, it was only 0-0 because both keepers had fantastic games. We are creating chances and our home form is very good. It also helps that their form is WLWLW, it should be quite obvious what the next one in the sequence should be! They also travelled to Sheffield to play the filth on Tuesday; I don’t know if they’ve stayed here all week or if they went home, to come back, to go home again; either way, that has to be mentally and probably physically draining. Travelling is a bitch, as is staying away from home, I can vouch for both of these!

We’re best price 4/5 (BetFred and many others) to win and it’s also best price 4/5 to be under 2.5 goals (BetFred). I'm not sure I can take either of those prices, perhaps the win, but I'd still want a bit more. Maybe you could double it up, I dunno. The 1-1 draw is widely available at 6/1, as is United 1-0. You can get 15/2 about a 2/1 scoreline from Blue Square. As I said, I refuse to bet on United games nowadays but if you made me, I’d be ploughing into the 6/1 for a 1-0 win to the mighty red and white wizards.

Up the Blades!